So, this morning I woke up to a crying baby. Actually, I woke up several times throughout the night to a crying baby. Each time I went into her room to try and get her to go back to sleep I walked in to see her standing up, little fingers grasped so tightly on the railing, crying her eyes out. At the 11pm wakeup, I was able to put her back to sleep by rubbing her belly and shushing her. Around 12:30am, I decided to take the easy route and nursed her back to sleep and then at 2:45am, I brought her into bed with me. Trying to get her to sleep in her crib has not been easy but also because I haven't been consistent since I started this 3 weeks ago. The first week she got sick and of course I wasn't going to make her sleep alone when she was sick, the second week we went to Luxembourg on the weekend and slept in a hotel where she of course slept with me and then this past weekend we went to Paris where we co-slept. This morning, even though she was in bed with me, she started crying because it was time to wake up. Not all days start off like this...sometimes she's happy when she wakes. And then again, sometimes she's cranky. This morning she was a little of both. As I rushed to get her ready, she cried while changed her diaper, got her out of her PJs and into school clothes and then smiled and played while I got myself dressed. We brushed our teeth (while I sang the "Brush Brush Brush your teeth" song) and then we went downstairs and got the bottles ready for school.
This is a pretty typical morning these days...heck, the night was pretty typical too. It was actually one of the better nights! Last week there was a night where she woke up 9 times! I am hoping things get better soon. I haven't gotten a solid nights sleep in a while. During the last several months of pregnancy, I tossed and turned because my hips ached, then of course after she was born, I was up all night feeding her and even as she started sleeping through the night and things seemed like they were becoming easier I began to realize I was creating a milk monster. Addie wanted to be latched on the breast, all night long. And when I say all night long, I mean ALL night long. I would have to flip from side to side and even though I was doing it subconsciously and in my sleep I know I wasn't sleeping well. I honestly didn't mind though. I was getting pretty decent sleep, Addie was happy and sleeping well but everyone kept telling me I need to make the adjustment now, I needed to make her sleep in the crib now before she's too old to break the habit. It's a heartbreaking thing to have to do. I feel horrible making her sleep alone especially because I know how much she wants to sleep with me. She actually slept with me from day one. We were in the hospital and they gave me the little bassinet but I couldn't put her down, so she slept on my chest...and that continued even when we got home. So for the first 9 months Addie slept with me and now I'm trying to make the transition to the crib and it's not going very well.
Anyway, to get to my point...All of this lack of sleep might be a good thing. I mean, my body seems to be working off less sleep these days, well, with the help of my new found friend...Coffee!
My training is going pretty well...it could be better but for someone who is working, has a 9.5 month old and still finds time for socializing with friends I think I'm doing alright. My race is in exactly one month...June 18th!!! I can't wait but I'm also pretty scared. It's been a long time since I've ran an ultra. I do love this race (ZugspitzUltraTrail) though so no matter what I'm just going to go out and enjoy the day.
Well, you can follow me on Strava if you want to see how my training is going or if you want to see how I do in the race. Just search for Dreama Walton :)
